My Writing Blog

Ethnography of A Teenager

Blood Ticker Than Water 

Sunrise Florida is were she grew up, it was a nice neighborhood a light post every 10 feet or direction you looked it. They had 24 hour security and  a community pool the size of the Bahamas, plus the biggest house on the block. Krystal was lucky she had everything kids her age could ask for. She has two parents who love and spoil her to death, they’ve been together for 23 years. She also has her own car her own room. Krystal is a family person she never really needed to go out and make friends when she has two sisters, Shannon 19, Ashley 23 and a little brother who is 9 years old.

Krystal and Shannon were never that far apart from age but definitely were close, they were more then sisters they were best friends. They went to the same high school for 2 years. They shared all the same drama, clothes, and walked each other to class. They didn’t need anyone else it was the Rosesnsteel sisters against the world.  They gossiped about the hottest boys and shared every dark secret they had to each other. It wasn’t always like this, growing up Krystal always looked up to Shannon and use to mock ever movement like she was playing follow the leader. As they grew up they realized it was so much easier to stick together then be alone.

Ashley was the oldest sister, she was like the mother figure to Krystal. They were polar opposite you wouldn’t even think they were 100% pure blood related. Ashley thought she had to be the boss of everyone. Krystal and Ashley usually butted heads and disagreed with everything but it was a love hate relationship. Krystal knows she loves Ashley she was the sister who had experienced everything first and felt like she wanted to prevent it happening to others. Krystal and Shannon often laughed at her and kept on their own paths.

Stevie was Krystal’s younger brother, the only brother out of four children. He usually hogged up all the love, you know being the heir to the Rosensteel name and all. Everyone knew not to mess with Stevie or you felt the wrath of his sisters.  Nothing came in-between the Rosensteel family they had strong siblings and strong parents to back them up. They all knew that at the end of the day it was about them. Many people resented her family because they looked so unified no one was ever alone. The family goal is to never leave anyone behind and Krystal is a firm believer in this. Wether it comes to her father, mother, sisters, or brother.

My Bedroom is My Safe-Zone 

When we live in our parents house, there isn’t much that truly belongs to us. Parents often use this fact to their advantage: “As long as you live in my house, you follow my rules!” “When YOU pay the mortgage, YOU can do whatever YOU want!” True we don’t pay the bills, but we do spend a large part of our time in that room, and it plays host to most of our belongings.

It was her own room Krystal didn’t have to worry about bumping into someone or having to fake laugh at her corny uncles drunk joke in her own room. It was her get away when she needed to get away, plus it was conveniently only 20 feet away. She had all her books stacked on her bed from her endless amount of homework given daily, she rarely turned on her lights she always lighted her room by little Christmas lights. No one was allowed unless invited. She’s always felt comfortable in her powder pink room, its been her room for 11 years now she knows every inch and crack of that room. No one would know that her diary is under all the shoe boxes to the far right in her room, or that her secret stash of makeup is in her cheetah Victoria Secret purse underneath all her clothes in her left drawer.

Krystal didn’t like anyone going in her room it didn’t matter how much she loved you it was not happening. She was not mad or anti social, it was just her private space where she can go to so she can relax. Everything in her room was carefully placed and planned out meticulously for  those 11 years, even the crusty cereal bowl thats practically molded to the floor under her bed. Or when you go into her closet and notice the color coded clothes from spring to fall colors, pants to shorts, crop tops to long sleeves. Krystal knew where everything was so what was the point for her to invite someone in who will move things around.

Closing Walls 

The walls were a light coffee color, the floor was an even darker brown with all the school breakfast splattered all over it. The wall were as dull as the curriculum. Krystal couldn’t tell you what the breakfast or lunch was she avoided even walking into the cafeteria. The cafe was known to house all the cliques. Krystal wasn’t associated with any she just wanted to get her work done and leave. She felt that the kids in her high school were always so concerned about what song Drake just released or who they were going to copy for 3rd periods homework. Her friends highlight of the week was if a new guy transferred to the school, Krystal wasn’t hypnotized by all this she knew  better. She understood that the better her grades the faster she could get out of there.

School is the biggest time consuming part of Krystal’s life. She spends at least 40 hours a week physically in school, 30 outside doing homework and studying. Krystal has always been an  A+ student but that doesn’t stop the day to day anxiety of that hell hole.  High school was about who hung out with who and who wore the newest clothes. The only thing motivating her at this point was she only had one year left.

The Beyond

Every person remembers moving out their parents house and taking on bigger responsibilities. It’s that bitter sweet moment that you cherish and hold on too. It was almost Krystal’s time, one more year then she was graduating and going to Florida State. She wouldn’t be able to see her parents and siblings everyday, or take her whole room that she’s known all her life. It was time to move on to the next step of “adulthood” that Krystal so yearned for. She wasn’t nervous she actually embraced the unknown and the uncertainty. It was time for this little teenager to grow up.

Aadia I like the theme you chose because Its true Ive always known the Mother to win custody battles. The best details you gave that really caught my attention is when you described how hard your dad worked to get you to go home with him, also how he had to completely change his lifestyle to adjust. I do think you should explain in detail more about how you felt and the actual events leading to the divorce. Your essay main focus seems to be that mothers are always the parent to win custody battles but your dad beat the odds. The structure is firm you go in chronological order just the time frame of the divorce courts. Great essay just want more details please.

PRO-ONLINE RELATIONSHIP

Jazmine Hughes-

Is the current editors of the Harpin, she is a blogger for a living. She claims to spend inordinate amount of time online. Jazmine believes that online relationships are a positive friendships to have. She goes on to speak on how easy it is to make new friends simply by asking for their social media account. “The web doesn’t preclude people from making IRL friends. It actually makes it easier.” A statement from Jazmine’s The Internet Can Make Real Life Friendships Easier.

Katherine Hertlein-

Is the program director of Marriage and Family Therapy at the University of Nevada. She does believe that online relationships have a positive effect on your life.  “ The internet has many qualities that bond people together” quotes from her article Does Easier Intimacy Online Lead To Easier Infidelity. Katherine thinks the internet brings people together, provides a sense of continuity through the day. It also makes it easier to avoid interactions if wanted.

Alice Marwick-

Is the director of the McGannon Center. Also believes that online relationships are beneficial. From reading Alice article Increased Social Support, Even Online, Is Beneficial. She explains how having an increase of social media friends determined your social rank in actual society. “Instagram “likes” or twitter “favorites” could be powerful reinforcements.”

ANTI-ONLINE RELATIONSHIP

Nicholas Carr-

Is a technology and culture writer. Mr. Carr in his article Projecting Onto the Screen claims that some relationships just right up don’t count because they are not as meaningful as the real valuable relationships he’s created in his lifetime. He believes “The screen presence leaves a lot of room for fantasizing or protecting the self into the other.” Nicolas isn’t a big fan of the online relationships because virtual friends bring anxiety.

Sherry Turkle

Is a psychologist and professor at M.I.T. Sherry is Anti-online relationships she feels like technology makes emotional “easy.” In her article Face-to-Face Friendships Involve Real Emotions she said “Every technology has its own affordance and the online life lets us hide in plain sight.” She also goes on to describing having friendships at the temperature you want.

I fell in love in 9th grade at Western High School. I didn’t expect it I for sure wasn’t looking for love but he made me fall for him. It was such a new feeling for me I didn’t know what it meant. I woke up with him on my mind feeling happy with warm fluttering in my stomach, ready to get all cute in case I saw him today. He was everything I ever wanted in a man. He had dreams so big and endless you could just tell he was going to accomplish anything if he set his mind to it. Don’t get me started on how handsome he is! He was my tall light skin Denzel Washington. He was so tall I never had to look for him too long in a crowd, I could always spot his big head above everyone else. When he would ask for a kiss I would have to get on the tip of my toes to reach him. The first few months together were paralyzing magical. It was like spilling a packet of seeds all over the front yard and watching flowers bloom sporadically the following spring. I fell in love meticulously and deeply, and I knew that I wanted him to be a part of my life forever. I never had someone who cared for me so consistently. He never left me like the others, when I needed someone he was the first person to calm my nerves. He hugged me so tight like I was a teddy bear to a newborn baby.

My High school sweetheart, oh how the time flew when we were together. So soon our anniversary I knew he would go all out. “come outside” the text he sent me, I panicked I wasn’t expecting him so soon. I instantaneously tripped and jumped into the shower. I hope he wouldn’t notice the cuts and patches from trying to shave my legs rapidly. My lungs curled up, I think I over did it with my perfume. He loved me regardless so why was I sweating nervously its just like any other date right? He pulled me in his arms closely and recalled all the sweet memories from last year together. My cheeks where puffy and sore from smiling constantly he always knew the right things to say. I couldn’t think back to a hour going by without him reminding me of how much he loved me.  He pulled out a little silver ring with a heart on it and told me he promises that he didn’t want to spend another year of his life without me.

Year two with the man of my dreams. we fought more this year but he still knew how to win over my heart. I love him so much but our work schedules were starting to create a drift. I couldn’t see him everyday anymore I wasn’t going to come in-between him and his work. He wanted to be a doctor so I assumed I better get use to the long work hours anyways. We still managed to see each other two or three times a week. He knew how to make those days like heaven to me. Nothing could tear us apart as soon as this semester was over I was 100% positive to being with my future husband everyday like the old times. I was still very much in love but  I didn’t feel the need to dress up in my news clothes when we went out, or over due it with the perfume. My heart didn’t skip a beat anymore I got comfortable around him.

Year three was filled with late nights alone, cold bed, dead phones, and excuses. He barley created time to call me where did we go wrong. I love him but I was starting to question if that was enough. We fought 70% of the time we were together I kept asking myself if this was normal, or could we overcome this. We couldn’t ever agree on where to go to dinner, he barley called me at night after his work day. He stopped sending me those detailed long messages saying how he was thinking about me throughout his day. When we would lay in bed together I felt so alone. I invested to much into this I wasn’t about to give up now. No relationship is perfect all the time. Or was I starting to creating excuses.

Year four, I’ve never felt so empty I thought maybe this was a phase. this whole time I thought maybe it was my fault to why we grew apart. I blamed myself for things that weren’t my fault. I accepted his apology every single time he would come back crying to me. I was so alone but he wasn’t. He was jumping from bed to bed, girl to girl while I was worried about him “working to much.” I was done I couldn’t keep feeling like this my family was worried about me. I never wanted to hang out with my friends anymore I was constantly depressed. I was going to leave him. I packed my things I was about to walk out. I saw the door with every step I took forward I felt that I was loosing every memory we’ve ever created together. I felt the pressure to slow down. Was this something I really wanted, was I ready to walk out this door and leave him behind. Ten more steps thats all I needed. A new life a new beginning this was going to be a relief I get to finally leave all this stress. Five more steps, regret was starting to sit in would I regret this? My head was starting to feel as heavy as my foot steps. I touched the cold rusted door knob. I made it, it was finally time to move on. As I took the first steps out I ran into someone and dropped my box I couldn’t tell who it was just a tall figure in a black hoodie covering his face. It was him he helped me pick up my things. His hands were cold as if he was waiting outside for hours. I looked into his bloodshot red eyes so many feelings rushed my conscience. I couldn’t process my thoughts fast enough next thing I knew I forgave him as he cried in my arms. My shirt was soaked he promised he wouldn’t do it again. He told me he didn’t know what he had till I threatened to leave. He was promising me everything I wanted just like the old times. This was the man I wanted to marry, have kids with and grow old together I gave him another chance. That lasted about a week, till another woman called me and gave me the gruesome details to their love life. Finally, the last straw was pulled. How could the man who I love so much destroy my heart. It was really time to move on I felt like a weight was lifted, it was time to love myself the way I loved him.

• Just want to start by saying I’m sorry for your lost! You can tell by your writing that your a very compassionate and caring person. I like how you started off by explaining how you looked up to your mother and basically followed in her footsteps. What seems to be the main message of this essay, where my heart dropped and I felt very connected is when you started explaining how taking care of people wasn’t only a job career for you it actually became a real life situation for you. I also connected with your essay when you started describing the feeling of taking a test that predicts the outcome of your future. I feel like everyone experience that feeling for example mine was taking the SAT to get into college. “I remember after taking the test removing my hand from the desk and seeing a moistened hand print there.” loved that part because its very relatable. one thing I think you should elaborate on is how hard it was for you to take on a “mom” role so young, you started to explain but a little more would have been nice. Overall GREAT memoir.

I was about to walk out. I saw the door, with every step I took forward I felt that I was loosing every memory we’ve ever created together. I felt the pressure to slow down. Is this something I really wanted, was I ready to walk out this door and leave him behind. Ten more steps thats all I needed. A new life, a new beginning. this was going to be a relief I get to finally leave all this stress. Five more steps, regret was starting to sit in would I regret this? my head was starting to feel as heavy as my foot steps. I touched the cold rusted door knob. I made it, it was finally time to move on. As I took the first steps out I ran into someone and dropped my box I couldn’t tell who it was just a tall figure in a black hoodie covering his face. it was him, he helped me pick up my things. his hands were cold as if he was waiting outside for hours. I looked into his bloodshot red eyes so many feelings rushed my conscience I couldn’t process my thoughts fast enough next thing I knew I forgave him as he cried in my arms.

I fell in love in 9^th grade at Western High School. I didn’t expect it, I for sure wasn’t looking for love but he made me fall for him. It was such a new feeling for me I didn’t know what it meant, I woke up with him on my mind. I woke up feeling happy with warm fluttering in my stomach, ready to get all cute in case I saw him today. The first few months together were paralyzing magical. It was like spilling a packet of seeds all over the front yard and watching flowers bloom sporadically the following spring. I fell in love meticulously and deeply, and I knew that I wanted him to be a part of my life forever. I never had someone who cared for me so consistently. He never left me like the others, when I needed someone he was the first person to calm my nerves. He hugged me so tight like I was a teddy bear to a newborn baby.

My High school sweetheart, oh how the time flew when we were together. So soon our anniversary, I knew he would go all out. “come outside” the text he sent me. I panicked I wasn’t expecting him so soon. I instantaneously tripped and jumped into the shower. I hope he wouldn’t notice the cuts and patches from trying to shave my legs rapidly. My lungs curled up, I think I over did it with my perfume. He loved me regardless so why was I sweating nervously, its just like any other date. right?

Year two with the man of my dreams. we fought more this year but he still knew how to win over my heart. I love him so much but our work schedules were starting to create a drift. I couldn’t see him everyday anymore, but we still saw each other every two days or three. He knew how to make those days like heaven to me. Nothing could tear us apart as soon as this semester was over I was 100% positive to being with my future husband everyday like the old times. I was still very much in love but my heart didn’t skip a beat anymore I got comfortable around him.

Year three, late nights alone, cold bed, and dead phones. He can barley create time to call me , where did we go wrong. I love him. we fought 70% of the time we were together, we couldn’t ever agree on where to go to dinner, he barley called me at night after his work day, he stopped sending me those cute long messages saying how he was thinking about me late nights. When we would lay in bed together I felt so alone. I invested to much into this I wasn’t about to give up now.

Year four, I’ve never felt so empty I thought maybe this was a phase. this whole time I thought maybe it was my fault to why we grew apart. I blamed myself for things that weren’t my fault. I accepted his apology every single time he would come back crying to me. I was so alone, but he wasn’t. He was jumping from bed to bed, girl to girl, while I was worried about him “working to much.” I was done I couldn’t keep feeling like this my family was worried about me, I never wanted to hang out with my friends anymore, I was constantly depressed. I was going to leave him. I packed my things  but he caught me at the door. He was crying in my arms, my shirt was soaked he promised he wouldn’t do it again. He told me he didn’t know what he had till I threatened to leave. He was promising me everything I wanted just like the old times. This was the man I wanted to marry, have kids with and grown old together. I gave him another chance. That lasted about a week, till another woman called me and gave me the gruesome details to their love life. Im done. How could the man who I loved so much destroy my heart.

In I Know Why the Caged Birds Sing by Maya Angelou she is a young child with her siblings, they have been abandoned by their parents after their divorce. Maya also finds herself tormented by the belief that she is a ugly child who will never measure up to anything. Its a good book because it can relate to how kids feel around the world.